elliotthebrave:

• “Wow, I never would have known you are deaf!” 
• “You don’t look deaf.”
• “She was so beautiful, you would have not known she was deaf.” 
• “What’s reading braille like?” 
• “Can you have children?”
• “You speak so well!” 
• “You don’t sound like a deaf person.” 
• “What? There’s no need for captions. Here, I’ll turn up the volume, I don’t mind.” (turns up volume on t.v. really loud, smiles and gives the thumbs up).
• “Oh, never mind. I’ll tell you later.”
• “Turn up your hearing aid!”
• “Why don’t deaf people just get cochlear implants?”
• “Oh, I love sign language! “A… . .B… . .C…”
• “Why don’t you ever listen to me?” 
• “I bet you are just pretending to be deaf, huh?”
•  ”What is your problem? You were hearing me fine just a second ago. Are you listening?” 
• “Oh, he’s probably not deaf. Selective hearing, right?” (laughs)
• “GEEZ! I…SAID… WHAT…DO…YOU…WANT…TO…DO?!!!”  
•  ”Doesn’t it make you sad that you won’t hear your child say, “I love you.”?
•  ”Can you read their lips and tell me what they are saying?” 
• “Oh, how do you sign @#%^, *#$%, %@!*&, and !@@#$%& ? 
•  ”Can you hear me now?” (laughs)
•  ”You don’t need an interpreter. We can understand what you are saying.”
• “Oh, you are deaf? Like Helen Keller! Cool!” 
• “Gosh, you deaf people are so angry and militant!” 
• (Whispers) “Look! He has a hearing aid, just like you!” (points)
• “Didn’t you hear? Oh- Eer, um…so sorry, um.” (laughs nervously)
• “Oh, you’re deaf? Sorry.” 
• “CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW??”
• “i can see your hearing aids, WHY CANT YOU HEAR ME?”
• “I’ve always wanted to learn sign language!” 
• “this one time.. on a bus.. i saw some Deaf people!”
• “Your accent is interesting! Where are you from??”
• “So like, what CAN you hear??”
• “Does it hurt?”
• “Dont you wish you could hear music?”

I’ve gotten at least half of these… some other ones I’ve gotten are:

• “I know this is probably inappropriate to ask but do you make noises while you have sex?”
• “Why do you make weird clicking noises while you sign?”
• *runs up to me without knowing me at all* “HEY! I know how to sign!” *makes gibberish hand gestures*
• “You’re deaf.” *tearfully* “God bless you.”
• “Hey can you say something for me? Come oooon. Just one word. I wanna hear what your voice sounds like.”
• “Oh you can’t hear. Um… nevermind.” *backs away quickly*
• “HA you looked at me just as I started yelling behind your back. YOU CAN HEAR! I KNEW IT!”
• “OMG YOU’RE DEAF, GIVE ME A SIGN NAME!”
• “Wow, you’re really smart for a deaf person!”
• “Oh cool you’re deaf. TEACH ME HOW TO SIGN RIGHT NOW.”
• *asks a million questions about my upbringing as a deaf person and about ASL before asking me ANYTHING non-deaf related, like what I do for a living for example*
• “Are you allowed to drive?”
• “Oh don’t worry about it. The conversation is soooo boring. You don’t want to know what we’re talking about.”
• “Sometime I actually wish I was deaf. It must be so peaceful.”
• “Oh you’re deaf… uh…” *looks at hearing friend standing right next to me* “Does she know her own name?”
• “I really want to study sign language so I can ~*help*~ deaf people.” 
• “Well ~*I*~ think sign language should be universal, what’s the point of having so many sign languages?”
• *makes random hand gestures* “So, what does that mean in ASL?”
• “Why aren’t you better at reading lips?”
• “It must be so quiet living with deaf people!”
• “It must be so terrible being deaf. I’m sorry”
• “Hi it’s nice to meet you…. so tell me what you think about Deaf culture. Is it real?”
• “Signed English sounds so much better than ASL!”
• “You grew up using Signed English? That must be why you’re good at English!”
• “I can kinda sign!” *pretends to be a mime*